Sunday, June 3, 2012
~"Behind Every Moment Of My Life..."~
Hello...my name is Benny Liew and definitely you all knows me in this story.I wanted to tell you all that...the two post which is "Something The Past Written In Me 1 and 2,written by Wendyll Lei" was an old but yet a memory that I ever being experienced...and that's the moment she only writes to me...and someone who bring us joy of life...~
Something The Past Written In Me-2-(written by Wendyll Lei)
A Lifetime And Wonderful Day with you~
I still remember my lifetime with you and Lawrence.When I return to Raub last 6 month ago,I saw you and you still looks like him.More than him and you looks like the person we use to care and sharing and in this lifetime too.
Sigh...
I wish I can meet you again but I wish I could.I always had a dream that we always play near the lake.We always sing songs and you always play the harmonica that time while Lawrence always clap his hand together with me.Then we always talk about our future,want to become a great writer,musician and his dream is want to become a great teacher.We always talk about our problems too that time.
Until one day....
He has gone and he leave a message to us.."never break up and I wish to be with you all again,brother and sister."..and that was I heard when you hold his left hand and I holding his right hand.He blew his last breath.And I still remember your eyes tears slowly flow from your heart to your eyes.I was about the same with you.Your heart breaks I know,just like mine too.It was 3 years ago.
I still remember your phrases to us.."There is no way we can give up in life cause every life is so important to the future."
Then..on the last day farewell your message to him were just "farewell,brother." and you leave me alone on that time..and I had to go KL and stay for 3 years until this year.
This year..I had a good day and good month,time and we almost spend time together this year and my parents were proud of you that you were in the Chart of The Year. Especially my dad that now he retired from his old company and working to another company.
Until today I can still remember how you teach me many things like dancing,gaming and music and also many things especially that you read many stories to me.
I was so happy to meet you again this year.
And also I met your friends too.
Sometimes you protect me from danger too like that day..you help me from that man try to rob me.
I still remember your stories about this man who struggle hard to find money for his wife and children until one day he had to do many crimes for his families and end up to death.And I still remember the ending of the stories too.His sons were success in his life.And the other one was how this boy always found his real dreams and the boy it was you,who found his dream now and today.
It was a wonderful time and this world maybe always meant for something.
Although we both were just friend but I can feel we are more than that.We are best friends and I even though we can be great friends instead.
Remember the ring I gave you and you don't know how to read Chinese.It means "BEST FRIENDS FOREVER" and remember the memorial chain that you are wearing by the name BENNEDICT L.N..I know it was memorial of him.I saw you always wearing it.
Now...
I know many things..I know that you got angry issue sometimes but you can keep patient.
I also know sometimes you can be rude for certain reason and you can be honest and many things.And you are the most weirdest,kind and the best person I ever met.I wonder if there any boys that are like this.It's rare.
Even your friend told me that you are good and friendly too.Like Diana Wen Shi told me once before.I was happy to talk to her last 3 days ago.Even Wai Hong and Uncle Peter too they share many things to me.
Ben,I know you will had a wonderful future lifetime if you success hard always.
Ben,I also know you can do it just like you told me that "Nothing is impossible after all."
I miss you so much.Even though many people can read this I know I can share something to the world too.
And today I wanna wish you luck even though you don't believe in luck sometimes but I wish you the best in this year PMR and so on till your life.
Actually I want to tell you that..once you told me before too "We may not meet again,but we may not forget each other."
And also Ben,thanks a lot.Thank you so much for this meaningful friendship between us.If you read this,I know you gonna cry and I'm sad too now.My tears flowing but I'm happy to know you.I am very happy now cause,you are now safe and sound so do I.And you might happy with your new life too.So do I.And today I wanna tell you that I am grateful with you always.Always in my heart.
Ben...
I love you so much..as someone I ever know forever and ever and ever and ever and ever...
See you soon^^..
And Wen Shi,thanks for your sharing that day.
Something The Past Written In Me-1-(written by Wendyll Lei)
He is a cunning,weird,friendly,lovely,caring,cute,cuddly,silent,good,talented and a great friend.But sometimes he always had very bad temper and little naive.Hahaha.LOL!
His name is Benny Liew,a boy I've ever met in my lifetime.He is the weirdest of all.Haha.
But one thing about him is..am I crush on him?If he read this sure he feeling sorry about it.
About my life with him---
I met Benny since I was 4 years old and also another boy too name Lawrence A.Laei.But Lawrence already pass away.Umm..my life with Ben now still normal except we both very far away now.
My life with him..
When I met him at the bus stop last 6 month ago,he was tall,good looking person and.
On the first day he take me to a park where this place a lot of change already.I walk with him that day and look all the beautiful lotus flower.It was a good place and nice too.
One day he was sad and he was holding a book with a chain written "Bennedict L.N".I look at his face and I ask why to him.he told me he always had bad dreams and always dream of something bad to him.He always pray and I saw his face were so sleepy and his eyes like tears raining.
One time also I was scared of thunder.I stay with him that night at a villa.We all friends were together too.I ask him to tell me a story that night before I sleep.He told me a lot of stories.I know he worry about me and the thunder so he had to sleep at the couch in my room.LOL..
Another thing also that you did a lot of things for me.Like you force to carry me because I want you to carry me.Haha..always shy on girl.
Sometimes I always had to do my work after we both join a band.We always had fun and love music.Remember we both travel with my dad to KL for taking your sign in" Chart of The Year"?Then I fell asleep and sleep on your shoulder.It was comfortable and you just scared too.I know you try to remove my head but you give up and leave it.Haha.LOL..I saw it already^^
Umm...
You also teach me a lot things like skateboard,dancing,singing,reading and a lot one.Like that day accidental knock on your head and step your leg while you teach me dance.And also skateboard spoiled already also.But you always told me don't give up.I never give up.
Remember ma umm..you teach me how to play computer games like Left 4 Dead and Red Alert 3?It was fun and nice also.I like boys games sometimes.LOL..haha.And remember we watch a show until we all scared already call this show is "Paranormal Activity".I was so scared and had to hold your hand.And you were so shock and drop down from the chair already cause I hold your hand and you thought what was that thing one.Haha..LOL.haiz...you really scare ar?
One day also your hair is long and I take your hair and style it.Remember ma?I put a lot of gel and sticky on your hair.You just laugh and play play with it.it was nice looking.Haha.And also you take my hair and make become like all straight up one.Haha.I love your hair style.haha..
Last time when I saw your art is really beautiful and nice.You were drawing two people standing and not face each other.One was you and me.Haha.I know de.And you got shock that I take your drawing and sign it write there "Good luck".Haha..
And also I know you always hate people said this and that to you but you keep patient one.
Remember I hold your hand you feel like want to let go?I know you still always scared but I hold harder and your hand a bit pain.You want to release but I don't want.Cause you so naive one.haha..
One day also I saw you were alone at the shop drinking with your friends that afternoon.I wanted to be with you but all your friends there.So I brave to go there and seat next to you and you got shock.You ask me to sit down and I seat.Your friend suspect we both always.Remember them ma?They ask me who am I la..this la..that la.haha.I tell them I was your best friend and hold your hand again.I can see your face red like hot fire one de.
Sometimes you always go town alone until on that day I always follow you to town.Sometimes I see a lot things there also.Sometimes we both spend time see stars at night also got.Until late night also got too and you scare me you said you saw U.F.O.hahahahahahaXD!!I was laugh crazy already that time.And you were joking with me.
Umm...what again ya?
Oh yah!You also got help me and my father to do musical and work for him.You were playing the harmonica and guitar.It was nice and beautiful.We took and mark it well.Remember you sing this song "In My Life".I was sing with you.You were so happy and cute looking.Your voice is so nice and deeply cool.
You also protect me from someone who almost take me handbag.You were so angry and punch him so hard.I was so scared and never see you like this before.I was so so so scared.
I got a lot story to tell but want to write lazy already oo.
He is the best best best person I ever met.He teach me lots lots of things.Like religion of Christianity,games and many many things de la.
Umm..but I still remember I ask you one crazy question..DO YOU LOVE ME?
And the answer you did not answer at all one.
Umm..
and also that night I still remember where you were going to the hospital and you were fainted because you had anemia.I was so worry of you so much.I don't know what was happen to you.I was so scared and it remind me of Lawrence.I was crying and you finally fine and okay.I was scared.
Actually I want to tell you that I know you a lot and you are my best soulmate.No other people can replace you.
But one day..
I had to leave from here...and we both might cannot meet again but our hearts and link again.And I kiss you for the last time ever on that day at the airport.I was weird why are we doing something stupid.But..we just normal right?Nothing special right?
I had crush on you that time..but I don't know you with me or not.I don't know why that you are the person who link with me.Ben,I love you.I know you can't take it but we both are best friends.I hope we can meet again always now.It's been 10 years from now since we are best friends.Even your friend(don't want tell you who) tell me you are weird and kind and many many more la.Umm..this is my homework to you.I hope you can read it somehow.Okay la..I want to go now and I hope we can meet again.See you..muahh^^
Ben,I love you.
I will see you soon^^
To Benny Liew Nogen.And memory of Lawrence A.Laie``
Thursday, June 24, 2010
Good Bye-THE END
Time:02.40pm
Date:24,June.2010
Location:In my room..now...
I was wondering to write/type my last diary today and as I thought...I'll write it.
This one is about the last moment of my friendship with Wendyll....
Time:04.30pm
Date:21,June.2010
Location:KLIA(Kuala Lumpur International Airport)
On that last moment...
Wendyll was together with her parents at the airport station.Before we all when off..I was there with my friends a group and together with the villa residence too.
This is my last note with her.
"Wendyll...is this goodbye?"
"I think so.."she said and her tears weeping.
I hold her hand and said..."good bye.." and she had to go off....and before that she kiss my lips for a last time.....with thickness..... unforgettable memory...and when she turn her face towards me.....her tears show a meaning of sadness.Her parents also thank me on the day that I take care of her in the villa.
My tears flow slowly and like I can't take it off away what has dream off.Looks like it's the end for us now.
When she enter the port..and she was gone...and had to went off now....
Her last word to me was...."Ben...there is another future awaiting for you...and you'll find another for it."
IN MY MEMORIAL LIFE FOR THIS DAY.........THIS IS GOODBYE.....AND GOOD BYE...IS ONE OF THE BITTER MEMORY....AND FOR YOU...FIND A NEW FUTURE...ALWAYS HAD A CHANCE IN LIFE....WE MAY NEVER MEET AGAIN BUT I'LL REMEMBER YOU....AND WE MAY NOT KNOW AGAIN...AND MY FUTURE MAYBE TOWARDS OTHERS....GOODBYE....MY DEAR FRIEND......
.......and until today..I had to leave the villa and keep in touch with Ooya and the others...looks like....we all had leave...and this was my real good bye...and Lawrence...your lucky...bye....
GOOD BYE...FRIENDS......~~
THE END....(Benny Liew..........)~~
Date:24,June.2010
Location:In my room..now...
I was wondering to write/type my last diary today and as I thought...I'll write it.
This one is about the last moment of my friendship with Wendyll....
Time:04.30pm
Date:21,June.2010
Location:KLIA(Kuala Lumpur International Airport)
On that last moment...
Wendyll was together with her parents at the airport station.Before we all when off..I was there with my friends a group and together with the villa residence too.
This is my last note with her.
"Wendyll...is this goodbye?"
"I think so.."she said and her tears weeping.
I hold her hand and said..."good bye.." and she had to go off....and before that she kiss my lips for a last time.....with thickness..... unforgettable memory...and when she turn her face towards me.....her tears show a meaning of sadness.Her parents also thank me on the day that I take care of her in the villa.
My tears flow slowly and like I can't take it off away what has dream off.Looks like it's the end for us now.
When she enter the port..and she was gone...and had to went off now....
Her last word to me was...."Ben...there is another future awaiting for you...and you'll find another for it."
IN MY MEMORIAL LIFE FOR THIS DAY.........THIS IS GOODBYE.....AND GOOD BYE...IS ONE OF THE BITTER MEMORY....AND FOR YOU...FIND A NEW FUTURE...ALWAYS HAD A CHANCE IN LIFE....WE MAY NEVER MEET AGAIN BUT I'LL REMEMBER YOU....AND WE MAY NOT KNOW AGAIN...AND MY FUTURE MAYBE TOWARDS OTHERS....GOODBYE....MY DEAR FRIEND......
.......and until today..I had to leave the villa and keep in touch with Ooya and the others...looks like....we all had leave...and this was my real good bye...and Lawrence...your lucky...bye....
GOOD BYE...FRIENDS......~~
THE END....(Benny Liew..........)~~
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Its End Here...
Goodbye....my friends.....you had been the one for me...and I'll stop here..cause..there is a bother...that I won't want to know anymore.......see you all......GOODBYE.....and sorry.....
SEE YOU SOON.................................................(Benny Liew)
SEE YOU SOON.................................................(Benny Liew)
Sunday, June 6, 2010
Saturday, June 5, 2010
Looks like I won't going to blog...
Time:12.38am
Date:05.June.2010
Location:In my room...
Looks like I'm not going to blog.Sigh...at least..I will blog a series of my nightmare stories...well..at least.
The reason for I not blogging this cause...I won;t be on special..I mean...day...of my real life.
Looks like I gonna write my nightmares....
To Be Continued................
Benny Liew...............(Two weeks is on the run...)...............
Date:05.June.2010
Location:In my room...
Looks like I'm not going to blog.Sigh...at least..I will blog a series of my nightmare stories...well..at least.
The reason for I not blogging this cause...I won;t be on special..I mean...day...of my real life.
Looks like I gonna write my nightmares....
To Be Continued................
Benny Liew...............(Two weeks is on the run...)...............
Friday, June 4, 2010
Are You or Me??
Time:12.21am
Date:04.June.2010
Location:My room...
Now...I am alone..and I would prefer it that I am not alone...and I was asleep at 10.30pm...and I awake with my nightmares...
It was like....this...
That time...it was a dream I thought and I saw a road...where it head to a place..and I move...and saw a bird...and it flew away...as I follow it..the man appeared behind me and hold my shoulder...and I look at him....as he smiles at me.
Then...he's gone..and I look at the place again..with another three figures..and this time...it's her again.
I heard a laugh and she walks by...I heard a chuckled as she walks in and I heard..a cry as I walk in...and she repeat her words three times..."Ben...stay away.." and i walk further...her face look at me and I straightly awake....and I was sweating and my brother was looking at me and said..
"What the f**k are you dreaming?"
"Nothing"
And he went out and said..."Good night"...he gave me a cup of water and close the door...
I look at my hands..and I lay down my head...and cried.....and then...I wish to blog it..and I wake up and on my laptop...
I saw the figure face were in all black aura just like once I did a black aura when I dream the first time....and our eyes were really exactly pale yellow red...I try to stop it..but IT bugging my mind so much till it so hurt!!...
I wish to stop now....
Now..I wish I was with her now..and my nightmares is just the beginning....
To Be Continued...............
Benny Liew................(Beginning of it.....)..........................
Date:04.June.2010
Location:My room...
Now...I am alone..and I would prefer it that I am not alone...and I was asleep at 10.30pm...and I awake with my nightmares...
It was like....this...
That time...it was a dream I thought and I saw a road...where it head to a place..and I move...and saw a bird...and it flew away...as I follow it..the man appeared behind me and hold my shoulder...and I look at him....as he smiles at me.
Then...he's gone..and I look at the place again..with another three figures..and this time...it's her again.
I heard a laugh and she walks by...I heard a chuckled as she walks in and I heard..a cry as I walk in...and she repeat her words three times..."Ben...stay away.." and i walk further...her face look at me and I straightly awake....and I was sweating and my brother was looking at me and said..
"What the f**k are you dreaming?"
"Nothing"
And he went out and said..."Good night"...he gave me a cup of water and close the door...
I look at my hands..and I lay down my head...and cried.....and then...I wish to blog it..and I wake up and on my laptop...
I saw the figure face were in all black aura just like once I did a black aura when I dream the first time....and our eyes were really exactly pale yellow red...I try to stop it..but IT bugging my mind so much till it so hurt!!...
I wish to stop now....
Now..I wish I was with her now..and my nightmares is just the beginning....
To Be Continued...............
Benny Liew................(Beginning of it.....)..........................
Thursday, June 3, 2010
Unending Night...
At the end of my memories, I searched for the future plans of my ideals,
I feared something, I couldn’t understand what…so I shivered in loneliness.
Without showing it, you always smiled gracefully
and embraced me in you arms.
As if awakening, I fell in love
and took you into my dreams.
But you’ve always, you have always,
tenderly lied to me…
Without saying anything, the reason for my hesitation, that reason
for my own selfishness and out of fear, I made it our vow.
Without being hugged, you’ve always gracefully smiled
and aimed for the unending night…
As if awakening, I fell in love
and took you into my dreams.
But you’ve always, you have always,
tenderly hurt me…
With your invinsible feelings, you gracefully smiled
and aimed for the unending night…
We’ve become so distant that time stopped, our distance become a song…
I’ve waited…I’ve always waited
for that time when we saw the shooting stars…
It's an unending night for us...till we gone...
Benny Liew.....
I feared something, I couldn’t understand what…so I shivered in loneliness.
Without showing it, you always smiled gracefully
and embraced me in you arms.
As if awakening, I fell in love
and took you into my dreams.
But you’ve always, you have always,
tenderly lied to me…
Without saying anything, the reason for my hesitation, that reason
for my own selfishness and out of fear, I made it our vow.
Without being hugged, you’ve always gracefully smiled
and aimed for the unending night…
As if awakening, I fell in love
and took you into my dreams.
But you’ve always, you have always,
tenderly hurt me…
With your invinsible feelings, you gracefully smiled
and aimed for the unending night…
We’ve become so distant that time stopped, our distance become a song…
I’ve waited…I’ve always waited
for that time when we saw the shooting stars…
It's an unending night for us...till we gone...
Benny Liew.....
Figure three..
Time:02.17pm
Date:03.June.2010
Location:My room...
I being alone now...cause...I had to reason..my friends...like they are dying on me....why???
Time:Midnight...
Date:20.May.2010
The man who in my dreams spoke about wonders of death in life...and I just go a walk with his words and feel to another puzzle which a good question to be ask///"Where the hell am I?"
I look back and saw 3 figures....it was Wendyll....Lawrence and who???...Who was the other figure...she look very familiar but...who is she?
Then...they all disappear and I was awake...and look around..with my body sweating worse...I cried and lie down back...as I look at my phone it was still a fresh midnight...that is 02.40am...and I look forward...
Who is she......I wonder...who is the figure on the left near Wendyll??
I don't want to remind at it anymore...but I will find out in this freaking nightmare......by myself...
To Be Continued..........
Benny Liew.......(Incursion dreams in my soul...........)..................
Date:03.June.2010
Location:My room...
I being alone now...cause...I had to reason..my friends...like they are dying on me....why???
Time:Midnight...
Date:20.May.2010
The man who in my dreams spoke about wonders of death in life...and I just go a walk with his words and feel to another puzzle which a good question to be ask///"Where the hell am I?"
I look back and saw 3 figures....it was Wendyll....Lawrence and who???...Who was the other figure...she look very familiar but...who is she?
Then...they all disappear and I was awake...and look around..with my body sweating worse...I cried and lie down back...as I look at my phone it was still a fresh midnight...that is 02.40am...and I look forward...
Who is she......I wonder...who is the figure on the left near Wendyll??
I don't want to remind at it anymore...but I will find out in this freaking nightmare......by myself...
To Be Continued..........
Benny Liew.......(Incursion dreams in my soul...........)..................
Look At One Day...
Time:02.04pm
Date:03.June.2010
Location:In my room...home...
It has been weeks I haven't blog..I wish to go back to the villa..but....I wonder..how is she now?
I was here..at home...waiting for my week to return and...my father doesn't allow me to return instead staying here.
What about Wendyll???
Date:30.May.2010
Location:Home....
I was alone at home...and thinking what am I doing here now...as I look outside..I wish to walk and around with Rocky and Lucky...since they two like to have a walk with their master.
I took them both at the river and feel myself...it was windy...and the sun didn't show up much.
I see my two dogs relax and sat down..as I look at the river and saw a few people fishing...
Then...I remind myself to Law...another dog....and I look at Rocky...and he look at me and jump on me....I shake his head and walk home...and feel disappointed...
It reminds me a lot of things...that we had go on....
Now....sad...
Now....lonely....
Now....what to do???
Now....I had a day for a chance...and a chance of a useless fence....sigh.......wish I could stop now.....
To Be Continued.................
Benny Liew........(Nothing....empty..... disappointed...)........................
Date:03.June.2010
Location:In my room...home...
It has been weeks I haven't blog..I wish to go back to the villa..but....I wonder..how is she now?
I was here..at home...waiting for my week to return and...my father doesn't allow me to return instead staying here.
What about Wendyll???
Date:30.May.2010
Location:Home....
I was alone at home...and thinking what am I doing here now...as I look outside..I wish to walk and around with Rocky and Lucky...since they two like to have a walk with their master.
I took them both at the river and feel myself...it was windy...and the sun didn't show up much.
I see my two dogs relax and sat down..as I look at the river and saw a few people fishing...
Then...I remind myself to Law...another dog....and I look at Rocky...and he look at me and jump on me....I shake his head and walk home...and feel disappointed...
It reminds me a lot of things...that we had go on....
Now....sad...
Now....lonely....
Now....what to do???
Now....I had a day for a chance...and a chance of a useless fence....sigh.......wish I could stop now.....
To Be Continued.................
Benny Liew........(Nothing....empty..... disappointed...)........................
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Nothings end..
Scream as much as I can,
Till it goes to the end,
Fill of sick and dreaded with again,
I wish I wasn't to be meant in my lifespan.
But I got a hope,
Like a rope never break,
I has a loop and loop,
And loop I will see you in doubt again...
Benny Liew......................
Till it goes to the end,
Fill of sick and dreaded with again,
I wish I wasn't to be meant in my lifespan.
But I got a hope,
Like a rope never break,
I has a loop and loop,
And loop I will see you in doubt again...
Benny Liew......................
What I did bad?
As usual..in life...I got a felling that life..wasn't fair enough to me.I was taught to learn many things but....can I do it in my hope so?
I did before sins...did you?
I did before deeds...did you?
I did before murderer of life...did you?
I did many things...like almost unleash madness...and didn't know what is next....sigh...what has on it?
Damn for all of lust and madness....damn...fool!!
When...I will...go on...and...I'm sorry...my dear...all of you...
I did before sins...did you?
I did before deeds...did you?
I did before murderer of life...did you?
I did many things...like almost unleash madness...and didn't know what is next....sigh...what has on it?
Damn for all of lust and madness....damn...fool!!
When...I will...go on...and...I'm sorry...my dear...all of you...
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
That Night of Sadness
Time:11.14pm
date:25.May.2010
Location:My own room...
I was so busy of studying and I had to blog last two days about before I going home for a week.So..tonight I got a little time to blog..
I was....feeling guilt that I did not tell my dear friend about...until she cries on me....
What have I done???...sigh....she was crying of me cause...I didn't tell her about my nightmare that always scared me...and one night before I leave her home for a week...
Time:09.40pm
Date:22.May.2010
Location:Room 14...
That night was the most guilt night...and she hold my shirt and cry on me..and beg me..why am I like this?
She was crazy...and ask me to stop this dream.I can't..and she cry sobbed like her tears fell every second.
She told me.."Why are you always avoid us when we are off away?"
As I told her "I don't know..."
Now this is making me worse.
She hold my back tight and ask me and why are you dream...and why am I...doing this to avoid all things up.
I hope and wish to be left by myself there...and I doesn't know what to do now...on that night I dream to wish this dream wasn't true...but...it's a de-ja-vu...
SIGH......
Then...her eyes made my shoulder wet..and wet and make my hand froze.I can feel her heartbeat for a while...and she was sobbed for a while.
As then...her eyes slowly close...and I just look at her....and she started to wake...and slap me in the face...then...she started to laugh....
I wonder why....her slap...haha....she said to me..."Ben...don't make us worry...and I hope...your nightmare will disappear..."
I took her hand..and said..."I hope so."..
My face with the red marks remind of a slap from a friend...and make me not to worry much on that dreams.
I hope so...
Then....she hold my touch my chest side and said.."Your heartbeat is slow..you should rest"..and look at my eyes that turn black and pale.I did not sleep for two days that time cause...I was busy a little and having to avoid...sigh...nevermind...
Later...she wanted to go to bed..and I take her there...and said a goodnight forehead kiss..and I went back to my room...and go back to her room..and I wanted to tell her another thing that....actually..in our life...nevermind...at the end you'll know.
Time:05.00am
Date:23.May.2010
Location:Room 14...
I was resting and...finished pack up...and had a hot bath made by myself.I was the only one who awake and suddenly.....Sumi awake and heading to the kitchen.I was finish bath and change that time.Then...I went to the kitchen and ask her..."Why are you here?"..and she said.."Oh!!...I hungry a bit.."..and I sweated!!!
She took a few potato chips and ask me if I wanted to share with her and I said.."Okay.."..and then..we head to the garden and eat together.
Time:Between 06.00am
Location:Garden side...
I was seating on the bench and look at the grass that is wet and fill with many greenery...and then,Sumi pop out the Shandy can..and drank.I told her that drink beer in the morning is not good and stop drink and said.."Your right"..and then..she hand me over the potato chips and I open it up and eat some..and then..she start to ask me question...
"Why..we all live here?"
And I told her..freedom...and she start ask me again...
"Long enough?"...
"Maybe.."
"Why maybe?"
"Cause..."..and my tongue hang my answer for it.
"Because of Wendyll,right?"
I just nodded my head.
She sigh at me and said..."Life always fell...like me..no family at all but still can leave alone."
I look at my hand and hold the ring.
"Hmm...you two not gonna stay here longer but what about us?"she ask me again.
"I don't know...maybe...I and Wendy meant to be separated"I told her.
"I know I know...you two..lost a twin..right?"she said in her soft tone.
I just nodded my head again.
She hold my back and said.."Hey..don't be sad.I understand what is the meaning of lost a family.You just lost a brother and I lost my both family."
"Sorry"I told her...and she chuckled laugh at me.
I really don't understand...she can be so happy now even she lost her family...but before that she was sad that time...and change a lot after we move in...and she said...
"Thank you"she smiled..
"Why?"I was curious..
"Cause..you help me a lot together with Wendyll"
"Err...I don't know...that will happen"I scratch my head.
Then...she gave me a hug a while and said thanks again..and going to her room...and I was grateful to help a person..but...can I help myself?
SURE CAN!
Time:Between 08.00am
Location:Room 14....
Wendy woke up and went to my room..and I wasn't sleeping instead I was reading a book...and she knock the door...and I open it.
She said..
"Sorry..about yesterday."she was regret herself.
"Nevermind.."I hold her shoulder...
"Ben..one week..will you be fine?"she look at me...
"I will!!"like Sumi told me this morning...
Then...she hold the ring and said..."Don't lost it...and I will hope for you always...as always."
I told her.."I will."
Then...Ka Zi call me up..cause..I was about to leaving.She said hurry up cause...I had to go to church later...so...I hold Wendyll hand and give a headkiss..and Ka Zi said..
"Young love..as always.."
I look at her and laugh...a bit.Wendyll said...
"Not as long.."
And I went in to her car....and she wave me "See you"..and not goodbye...
And I look at her...inside the car..and Ka Zi said..."ready?"
...
I tell her "Okay"...
Time:09.00am
Location:Church....
I thank to Ka Zi that she send me home...and I was at home as my dogs.."Rock and Lucky"..greets me...while surround me.I seat down and hug both of them and then...my brother open the door for me...and said..."Hey...come on in."..==''...with his silly cloth.
Then..I went to church.....
I look at all my youth brothers and sisters...and look at my ring....and my friends....and hope for them...were fragile...sigh.......
Then...Rebecca..one of my sister youth...said..."Wish you luck in exam"..and I thank her..and also...I wish everyone too...who had exam for this year...later...I went home...at 02.00pm...........
Time:11.30am
Location:School(SMKTK)
Date:24.may.2010
As always in school...miss old friends...as usual...sigh...wish I can Fong again..i wonder where the hell is him??...Always don't online....jeez....
Then...I ask Riby...and she said.."He only online for two hours a week.."
WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!A WEEK FOR ONLY TWO HOURS!!???
Oh my...brother...what happen???
Man...if he online I better chat with him and ask him why..
Then...I went home....with walking...as usual cause...my house was a little near.
Time:Now....
Location:In my room...
Now...I miss Wendyll..Law...and my friends....wish they were here now...but only a week..and remember Riby words.."Thank and grateful"..and my head is up!!
Now....I know..I had this chance..for it....and also...I will study hard for this year PMR for everyone and make a day for it...and be a better way of it!!!Just like I did to Sumi...give her a hope to make her happy again.
Oh crap!!...Now my dad scold me cause..I was online till late...and now..I off the light and if my dad finds out that I online now...I'll be deadmeat...
Well.....I gotta go now...cause...exam...and I wish for everyone out there...who having exam...goodluck...and not just that...wish you all the best...and also...Riby...thanks for everything and Fong,my brother....thank you for everything...and also....I am proud to calling you.."Bro"....
Now....damn it!!...My hamster sleeping and....I was alone and....my dad scold me..."GO TO SLEEP!!!"...
Nevermind...I will go dad...as usual.....hahaha...well.....see you all later...cause...tomorrow exam...and wish you all luck!!!And try the best you all can!!!!!!!And Sumi...thank you...for everything...you help me that I help you...thank you...and I hope...you'll be happy as always...even without family...like me...just a small matter...and a lost brother....thank you...very much..
To Be Continued................................................
Benny Liew.....................(Missing you doesn't mean I can't see you...and I will see you all soon...and I will...see you...").........................................................
P.S..(All the dialog translated from Mandarin...to English..cause all of them speak Mandarin and I had to translate it)..=='
date:25.May.2010
Location:My own room...
I was so busy of studying and I had to blog last two days about before I going home for a week.So..tonight I got a little time to blog..
I was....feeling guilt that I did not tell my dear friend about...until she cries on me....
What have I done???...sigh....she was crying of me cause...I didn't tell her about my nightmare that always scared me...and one night before I leave her home for a week...
Time:09.40pm
Date:22.May.2010
Location:Room 14...
That night was the most guilt night...and she hold my shirt and cry on me..and beg me..why am I like this?
She was crazy...and ask me to stop this dream.I can't..and she cry sobbed like her tears fell every second.
She told me.."Why are you always avoid us when we are off away?"
As I told her "I don't know..."
Now this is making me worse.
She hold my back tight and ask me and why are you dream...and why am I...doing this to avoid all things up.
I hope and wish to be left by myself there...and I doesn't know what to do now...on that night I dream to wish this dream wasn't true...but...it's a de-ja-vu...
SIGH......
Then...her eyes made my shoulder wet..and wet and make my hand froze.I can feel her heartbeat for a while...and she was sobbed for a while.
As then...her eyes slowly close...and I just look at her....and she started to wake...and slap me in the face...then...she started to laugh....
I wonder why....her slap...haha....she said to me..."Ben...don't make us worry...and I hope...your nightmare will disappear..."
I took her hand..and said..."I hope so."..
My face with the red marks remind of a slap from a friend...and make me not to worry much on that dreams.
I hope so...
Then....she hold my touch my chest side and said.."Your heartbeat is slow..you should rest"..and look at my eyes that turn black and pale.I did not sleep for two days that time cause...I was busy a little and having to avoid...sigh...nevermind...
Later...she wanted to go to bed..and I take her there...and said a goodnight forehead kiss..and I went back to my room...and go back to her room..and I wanted to tell her another thing that....actually..in our life...nevermind...at the end you'll know.
Time:05.00am
Date:23.May.2010
Location:Room 14...
I was resting and...finished pack up...and had a hot bath made by myself.I was the only one who awake and suddenly.....Sumi awake and heading to the kitchen.I was finish bath and change that time.Then...I went to the kitchen and ask her..."Why are you here?"..and she said.."Oh!!...I hungry a bit.."..and I sweated!!!
She took a few potato chips and ask me if I wanted to share with her and I said.."Okay.."..and then..we head to the garden and eat together.
Time:Between 06.00am
Location:Garden side...
I was seating on the bench and look at the grass that is wet and fill with many greenery...and then,Sumi pop out the Shandy can..and drank.I told her that drink beer in the morning is not good and stop drink and said.."Your right"..and then..she hand me over the potato chips and I open it up and eat some..and then..she start to ask me question...
"Why..we all live here?"
And I told her..freedom...and she start ask me again...
"Long enough?"...
"Maybe.."
"Why maybe?"
"Cause..."..and my tongue hang my answer for it.
"Because of Wendyll,right?"
I just nodded my head.
She sigh at me and said..."Life always fell...like me..no family at all but still can leave alone."
I look at my hand and hold the ring.
"Hmm...you two not gonna stay here longer but what about us?"she ask me again.
"I don't know...maybe...I and Wendy meant to be separated"I told her.
"I know I know...you two..lost a twin..right?"she said in her soft tone.
I just nodded my head again.
She hold my back and said.."Hey..don't be sad.I understand what is the meaning of lost a family.You just lost a brother and I lost my both family."
"Sorry"I told her...and she chuckled laugh at me.
I really don't understand...she can be so happy now even she lost her family...but before that she was sad that time...and change a lot after we move in...and she said...
"Thank you"she smiled..
"Why?"I was curious..
"Cause..you help me a lot together with Wendyll"
"Err...I don't know...that will happen"I scratch my head.
Then...she gave me a hug a while and said thanks again..and going to her room...and I was grateful to help a person..but...can I help myself?
SURE CAN!
Time:Between 08.00am
Location:Room 14....
Wendy woke up and went to my room..and I wasn't sleeping instead I was reading a book...and she knock the door...and I open it.
She said..
"Sorry..about yesterday."she was regret herself.
"Nevermind.."I hold her shoulder...
"Ben..one week..will you be fine?"she look at me...
"I will!!"like Sumi told me this morning...
Then...she hold the ring and said..."Don't lost it...and I will hope for you always...as always."
I told her.."I will."
Then...Ka Zi call me up..cause..I was about to leaving.She said hurry up cause...I had to go to church later...so...I hold Wendyll hand and give a headkiss..and Ka Zi said..
"Young love..as always.."
I look at her and laugh...a bit.Wendyll said...
"Not as long.."
And I went in to her car....and she wave me "See you"..and not goodbye...
And I look at her...inside the car..and Ka Zi said..."ready?"
...
I tell her "Okay"...
Time:09.00am
Location:Church....
I thank to Ka Zi that she send me home...and I was at home as my dogs.."Rock and Lucky"..greets me...while surround me.I seat down and hug both of them and then...my brother open the door for me...and said..."Hey...come on in."..==''...with his silly cloth.
Then..I went to church.....
I look at all my youth brothers and sisters...and look at my ring....and my friends....and hope for them...were fragile...sigh.......
Then...Rebecca..one of my sister youth...said..."Wish you luck in exam"..and I thank her..and also...I wish everyone too...who had exam for this year...later...I went home...at 02.00pm...........
Time:11.30am
Location:School(SMKTK)
Date:24.may.2010
As always in school...miss old friends...as usual...sigh...wish I can Fong again..i wonder where the hell is him??...Always don't online....jeez....
Then...I ask Riby...and she said.."He only online for two hours a week.."
WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!A WEEK FOR ONLY TWO HOURS!!???
Oh my...brother...what happen???
Man...if he online I better chat with him and ask him why..
Then...I went home....with walking...as usual cause...my house was a little near.
Time:Now....
Location:In my room...
Now...I miss Wendyll..Law...and my friends....wish they were here now...but only a week..and remember Riby words.."Thank and grateful"..and my head is up!!
Now....I know..I had this chance..for it....and also...I will study hard for this year PMR for everyone and make a day for it...and be a better way of it!!!Just like I did to Sumi...give her a hope to make her happy again.
Oh crap!!...Now my dad scold me cause..I was online till late...and now..I off the light and if my dad finds out that I online now...I'll be deadmeat...
Well.....I gotta go now...cause...exam...and I wish for everyone out there...who having exam...goodluck...and not just that...wish you all the best...and also...Riby...thanks for everything and Fong,my brother....thank you for everything...and also....I am proud to calling you.."Bro"....
Now....damn it!!...My hamster sleeping and....I was alone and....my dad scold me..."GO TO SLEEP!!!"...
Nevermind...I will go dad...as usual.....hahaha...well.....see you all later...cause...tomorrow exam...and wish you all luck!!!And try the best you all can!!!!!!!And Sumi...thank you...for everything...you help me that I help you...thank you...and I hope...you'll be happy as always...even without family...like me...just a small matter...and a lost brother....thank you...very much..
To Be Continued................................................
Benny Liew.....................(Missing you doesn't mean I can't see you...and I will see you all soon...and I will...see you...").........................................................
P.S..(All the dialog translated from Mandarin...to English..cause all of them speak Mandarin and I had to translate it)..=='
Monday, May 24, 2010
Home for a week...
Time:05.50am
Date:24.May.2010
Location:Home(My real home)
About yesterday...I went home and hope myself to visit and stay with my family a week.But..I'll blog later..cause I must ready for school so...I blog tonight later...so,see ya later...
To Be Continued..........................................
Benny Liew.................(Home and relaxation....).............................
Date:24.May.2010
Location:Home(My real home)
About yesterday...I went home and hope myself to visit and stay with my family a week.But..I'll blog later..cause I must ready for school so...I blog tonight later...so,see ya later...
To Be Continued..........................................
Benny Liew.................(Home and relaxation....).............................
Friday, May 21, 2010
Fear of a word..
Fear me of a word,
List from hell that is no sorted dirt,
isn't it wonderful if there was a rainbow flew from a sky,
Where colors flew through my mind.
Wonder day in my mind,
Giving hope through everytime,
Damn peasant is not a time,
Darn hope die through like hymn.
See you all in another time...and this is just a joke...HAHAHA!!
List from hell that is no sorted dirt,
isn't it wonderful if there was a rainbow flew from a sky,
Where colors flew through my mind.
Wonder day in my mind,
Giving hope through everytime,
Damn peasant is not a time,
Darn hope die through like hymn.
See you all in another time...and this is just a joke...HAHAHA!!
Near than ever...
Time:10.05am
Date:21.May.2010
Location:Room 14...
I realize what I had done last few months and I the one who was wrong.It was my fault not everyone.I just had it.Thanks to them who help me everytime even I not need for help.
It was granted for a certain gifts and I also not sure..what has happen to me.I'm so sorry.
Well...about yesterday..it was one special day.....and one....touch moment...and.....
Time:05.30am
Date:20.May.2010
Location:Room 14...
I woke up..and I saw my cloth were iron by someone.I wonder who and I look outside that Wendyll is with Mui Mui and Miss.Landlady.
Then...I take my towel and when in to the bathroom to had shower.I look back at my hand...and my injuries were almost heal.
So...after finish bath..I went back to my room and change my school uniform.
Time:06.20am
Location:On the way...
Then...Mui Mui knock the door and ask me am I ready?..and she take me to Wendyll....and I look at her...with fill of guilt.
She held my arm and take me to the car.
Ka Zi start the car then....we're on the way.
Time:06.40am
Location:SMKTK
When Ka Zi reach at Secondary Chung Ching..I look at her and she said..."don't be sad..okay?"
I just nodded my head....and she went in.
Later..Ka Zi also ask me what happen last night......and I was shouted...hahaha...and I told her....nothing...just a dream..and she laughed at me.
Then...she put me in school..
Time:11.30am
Location:Classroom...3D
I was inside my classroom studying..and Sonisha came in...and she bring me treats...by the way....it's from someone special...a friend...a sister...it was from Riby...
I was surprise and keep it...so..I want to thank her before open.
Time:02.10pm
Location:On the way back...
I wait for Riby and she was not there...so..I just wait..and Ka Zi had arrived...so..I just enter the car..and leave it...maybe later I can thank her.
Then...Ka Zi go to Chung Ching...so..she ask me to find her inside the school..and I got nervous...
When I enter the school...everyone look at me..and....one of the girls smile at me so I smile at her back.
Then...I ask one of the boys where is Form 2 class...and he point up there...the fourth floor...WHAT!!!!???....Jeez....i had to climb up to find her...and finally...I found her...with her bag full of books...and I help her up.
Her friend were beside her and ask her..."Who is this..?"..and she said..."The person I care"...and she sneaky laugh and ask me.."Is this your....girl?"..and my face boiled...and said...."Yes.."..and she said.."Oho!!!"...and she tell me luck of all and I thank her..and everyone see me....while we walking..I mean...us.
Everyone start to talking each other and I can hear sound..they keep on said.."Who is this?""Where does he come from?"
Who cares anyway..I open the door for her and she went in..and I put her bag in...so...I help her..and we both went home.
Time:04.10pm
Location:Home....
Finally...I had my bike.....and my dad send it here...so..I can enjoy cycle one whole place here..and she said..."How to ride?"...and I look at her...and try to teach her and she said she don't want.
so..I TAKE THE BIKE AND RIDE AND FELL...cause...I also not sure how to ride it.
Time:05.00pm
Location:Room 14....
I went home..and damn it..feel so disappointed cause...I almost forget all my bike style...
So..I went home..and bath..and look at Wendy room..suddenly saw Sumi humming a song that makes me familiar..and the song she hum was......."Anata Ga Ita Mori"...and that song..I let her hear before once....
So...I ask Sumi what happen and she laugh at me...cause....she said..."why are you dress like bath??"
"I WAS SWEATING LA!!!"
Then..she went in her room...and just smile...and I glad that Sumi can happy and smile once again.
Then...I had a good bath..and went back to my room...
Time:08.30pm
Location:Room 14...
I train my guitar and keyboard...and I was finish...so..I look at her room...and it was rain that time...and she knock my door and ask me to eat dinner and I said later...and I hear a silent voice...
She was sobbing her tears...
I heard bang doors...and i went back to her room...and quickly ask her what happen?She open the door...and I went in..and her tears drip..and she said..."Why are you so busy although until you don't want to eat?"
I just keep silent...and explain....but hard.
She just call me come closer...and I seat next her on her bed.
She hug me...and I held her...and it was cold....and she said.."Don't make me worry"
I swap her head....and she said she want went to bed..and....she was sleep...and my hand stuck with hers.
So....this is getting me more nervous and I had to sleep with her....just next her..and my eyes shut..and I feel...stupid.....
I was try to release myself that time...and i was sleeping...with her..tightly warm....
Until....tomorrow morning...now.....
Time:09.00am
Location:Room 15...
I woke up and saw she was next me..and i woke up quickly and drop on the floor..and she said..."Are you okay?"..and i said I'm fine and when she smiled at me...I remember...it was a memories that straightly reminds me!!!It was a break nightmare..i broke one nightmare...cause..when I sleep with her...my nightmare did not appear....
I kiss her head and thanked her....and I went outside to my room...
Time:Now....
Location:Room 14...
Now...I blogging and finish blog and later...I want to go out...and hopeful that...my dreams...will soon gone....
And one more thing about yesterday....the message that my foster sister gave me.....
"Gud luck in ur study n PMR.Dun b sad.B grateful wit wat do u hav nw.Ma n kai kow will always suppot u..luv u!!"
I understand that now......thanks both of you...I wish you all luck too..and love you all...and now..I just open the sweet...and eat the lollipop inside...hahahaha......
Well...I got to go now...and hopeful...my life.......
To Be Continued......................................................
Benny Liew.............(Thanks to you...and maybe this isn't enough....and I hope...I can thank you more than I do..my friends....)........................................
Date:21.May.2010
Location:Room 14...
I realize what I had done last few months and I the one who was wrong.It was my fault not everyone.I just had it.Thanks to them who help me everytime even I not need for help.
It was granted for a certain gifts and I also not sure..what has happen to me.I'm so sorry.
Well...about yesterday..it was one special day.....and one....touch moment...and.....
Time:05.30am
Date:20.May.2010
Location:Room 14...
I woke up..and I saw my cloth were iron by someone.I wonder who and I look outside that Wendyll is with Mui Mui and Miss.Landlady.
Then...I take my towel and when in to the bathroom to had shower.I look back at my hand...and my injuries were almost heal.
So...after finish bath..I went back to my room and change my school uniform.
Time:06.20am
Location:On the way...
Then...Mui Mui knock the door and ask me am I ready?..and she take me to Wendyll....and I look at her...with fill of guilt.
She held my arm and take me to the car.
Ka Zi start the car then....we're on the way.
Time:06.40am
Location:SMKTK
When Ka Zi reach at Secondary Chung Ching..I look at her and she said..."don't be sad..okay?"
I just nodded my head....and she went in.
Later..Ka Zi also ask me what happen last night......and I was shouted...hahaha...and I told her....nothing...just a dream..and she laughed at me.
Then...she put me in school..
Time:11.30am
Location:Classroom...3D
I was inside my classroom studying..and Sonisha came in...and she bring me treats...by the way....it's from someone special...a friend...a sister...it was from Riby...
I was surprise and keep it...so..I want to thank her before open.
Time:02.10pm
Location:On the way back...
I wait for Riby and she was not there...so..I just wait..and Ka Zi had arrived...so..I just enter the car..and leave it...maybe later I can thank her.
Then...Ka Zi go to Chung Ching...so..she ask me to find her inside the school..and I got nervous...
When I enter the school...everyone look at me..and....one of the girls smile at me so I smile at her back.
Then...I ask one of the boys where is Form 2 class...and he point up there...the fourth floor...WHAT!!!!???....Jeez....i had to climb up to find her...and finally...I found her...with her bag full of books...and I help her up.
Her friend were beside her and ask her..."Who is this..?"..and she said..."The person I care"...and she sneaky laugh and ask me.."Is this your....girl?"..and my face boiled...and said...."Yes.."..and she said.."Oho!!!"...and she tell me luck of all and I thank her..and everyone see me....while we walking..I mean...us.
Everyone start to talking each other and I can hear sound..they keep on said.."Who is this?""Where does he come from?"
Who cares anyway..I open the door for her and she went in..and I put her bag in...so...I help her..and we both went home.
Time:04.10pm
Location:Home....
Finally...I had my bike.....and my dad send it here...so..I can enjoy cycle one whole place here..and she said..."How to ride?"...and I look at her...and try to teach her and she said she don't want.
so..I TAKE THE BIKE AND RIDE AND FELL...cause...I also not sure how to ride it.
Time:05.00pm
Location:Room 14....
I went home..and damn it..feel so disappointed cause...I almost forget all my bike style...
So..I went home..and bath..and look at Wendy room..suddenly saw Sumi humming a song that makes me familiar..and the song she hum was......."Anata Ga Ita Mori"...and that song..I let her hear before once....
So...I ask Sumi what happen and she laugh at me...cause....she said..."why are you dress like bath??"
"I WAS SWEATING LA!!!"
Then..she went in her room...and just smile...and I glad that Sumi can happy and smile once again.
Then...I had a good bath..and went back to my room...
Time:08.30pm
Location:Room 14...
I train my guitar and keyboard...and I was finish...so..I look at her room...and it was rain that time...and she knock my door and ask me to eat dinner and I said later...and I hear a silent voice...
She was sobbing her tears...
I heard bang doors...and i went back to her room...and quickly ask her what happen?She open the door...and I went in..and her tears drip..and she said..."Why are you so busy although until you don't want to eat?"
I just keep silent...and explain....but hard.
She just call me come closer...and I seat next her on her bed.
She hug me...and I held her...and it was cold....and she said.."Don't make me worry"
I swap her head....and she said she want went to bed..and....she was sleep...and my hand stuck with hers.
So....this is getting me more nervous and I had to sleep with her....just next her..and my eyes shut..and I feel...stupid.....
I was try to release myself that time...and i was sleeping...with her..tightly warm....
Until....tomorrow morning...now.....
Time:09.00am
Location:Room 15...
I woke up and saw she was next me..and i woke up quickly and drop on the floor..and she said..."Are you okay?"..and i said I'm fine and when she smiled at me...I remember...it was a memories that straightly reminds me!!!It was a break nightmare..i broke one nightmare...cause..when I sleep with her...my nightmare did not appear....
I kiss her head and thanked her....and I went outside to my room...
Time:Now....
Location:Room 14...
Now...I blogging and finish blog and later...I want to go out...and hopeful that...my dreams...will soon gone....
And one more thing about yesterday....the message that my foster sister gave me.....
"Gud luck in ur study n PMR.Dun b sad.B grateful wit wat do u hav nw.Ma n kai kow will always suppot u..luv u!!"
I understand that now......thanks both of you...I wish you all luck too..and love you all...and now..I just open the sweet...and eat the lollipop inside...hahahaha......
Well...I got to go now...and hopeful...my life.......
To Be Continued......................................................
Benny Liew.............(Thanks to you...and maybe this isn't enough....and I hope...I can thank you more than I do..my friends....)........................................
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Guilt....
Time:05.59pm
Date:18.May.2010
Location:Room 14....
This time I wasn't sure what am I doing but....yesterday night...I mean...that night...was feeling guilt to know but now...I'm feeling bad...and worse...nevertheless....I hope she'll understand.
Now...
I had nothing to said...well...maybe later...see ya....==''..by the way...now I had to play with Law and Wendy.....outside area....
To Be Continued...........................................
Benny Liew.....(Huh??......).................................
Date:18.May.2010
Location:Room 14....
This time I wasn't sure what am I doing but....yesterday night...I mean...that night...was feeling guilt to know but now...I'm feeling bad...and worse...nevertheless....I hope she'll understand.
Now...
I had nothing to said...well...maybe later...see ya....==''..by the way...now I had to play with Law and Wendy.....outside area....
To Be Continued...........................................
Benny Liew.....(Huh??......).................................
Monday, May 17, 2010
Rain has tears...
Time:06.39pm
Date:17.May.2010
Location:Room 14...
I was busy last night so I had no time to blog but it was so hard rain so I had to see her for a moment.Well...about last night....
Time:09.50pm
Date:16.May.2010
Location:Room 15...
I went in her room and see what happen cause it was rain and I heard sneezed sound inside her room.So...I went in and saw she was looking at her laptop and I hold her shoulder behind.
Later...I had to massage her at the end...and she said.."Your hand were soft rather than rough from others"..and I tell...her...."Sorry about last three days ago that I went out"..and then...she turn and ask me.."Why are you scared?"..and she hold my face with her smooth palm and I can't answer anything.
She sigh for a moment and look at me...as I can't look at her and look outside the window...when the rain has cried hardly...and I hold her hand...and tell her...as honestly..."I will lose you all but in my heart..will not"..and she quickly swap me a hug and almost chocked me...but...I can feel she was....actually crying...and I hold her and can feel her heart was sad all because of me and I was feeling guilty of myself..
Later...she release me..and her tears were stop and her face were sticky...and I wipe it with tissue...and she said..she wanna rest cause...she was feeling sleepy that time and I help her shutdown her laptop...and I went to her bed and she lay down..and I told her...everything will be fine so...I hold her hand...and kiss her forehead...as she smile at me.
Then...I walk back...and see her face at the door..and close the door...and outside...it was raining and I look at the sky...and blew a sigh...so...I went back to my room...and rest too...
Time:11.00pm
Location:Room 14...
Then....I had asleep...as I remember..the nightmare..was...no more..???......Well...I hope so...
Today.....
Well.....useless day...teacher's day is not cool at all!!...Like shit...so...I better skip this!!!....Honestly...those teacher's there never ever know what is student feeling...and...argh....nevermind...
Now...
Time:06.53pm
Location:Garden side.....
Now.......I blogging and had a sad time for my dear..who was because of me...making her broke...but...I will...do what is best for her....
Well...I smells dinner...and got to go..well.....see you again...in another special day.....
To Be Continued........................................
Benny Liew...................................(Sigh...what had I done???)......................
Date:17.May.2010
Location:Room 14...
I was busy last night so I had no time to blog but it was so hard rain so I had to see her for a moment.Well...about last night....
Time:09.50pm
Date:16.May.2010
Location:Room 15...
I went in her room and see what happen cause it was rain and I heard sneezed sound inside her room.So...I went in and saw she was looking at her laptop and I hold her shoulder behind.
Later...I had to massage her at the end...and she said.."Your hand were soft rather than rough from others"..and I tell...her...."Sorry about last three days ago that I went out"..and then...she turn and ask me.."Why are you scared?"..and she hold my face with her smooth palm and I can't answer anything.
She sigh for a moment and look at me...as I can't look at her and look outside the window...when the rain has cried hardly...and I hold her hand...and tell her...as honestly..."I will lose you all but in my heart..will not"..and she quickly swap me a hug and almost chocked me...but...I can feel she was....actually crying...and I hold her and can feel her heart was sad all because of me and I was feeling guilty of myself..
Later...she release me..and her tears were stop and her face were sticky...and I wipe it with tissue...and she said..she wanna rest cause...she was feeling sleepy that time and I help her shutdown her laptop...and I went to her bed and she lay down..and I told her...everything will be fine so...I hold her hand...and kiss her forehead...as she smile at me.
Then...I walk back...and see her face at the door..and close the door...and outside...it was raining and I look at the sky...and blew a sigh...so...I went back to my room...and rest too...
Time:11.00pm
Location:Room 14...
Then....I had asleep...as I remember..the nightmare..was...no more..???......Well...I hope so...
Today.....
Well.....useless day...teacher's day is not cool at all!!...Like shit...so...I better skip this!!!....Honestly...those teacher's there never ever know what is student feeling...and...argh....nevermind...
Now...
Time:06.53pm
Location:Garden side.....
Now.......I blogging and had a sad time for my dear..who was because of me...making her broke...but...I will...do what is best for her....
Well...I smells dinner...and got to go..well.....see you again...in another special day.....
To Be Continued........................................
Benny Liew...................................(Sigh...what had I done???)......................
Say what!?Weapon and causes..
Like fool in here always doubt life as usual like moron who pass their life just for money. Example like one nation can be sell to almost one thousand trillion dollars(just in case if they had) to making more weapons and nuclear(if one)over one world.
Nation wide has selected that world domination can cause unfolded area and may cause losing human population too.
Nuclear populated to thousand or billion of atomic substance or reaction to mutation or toxic.
Example:
About EMP charge power,Laser power and Plasma power
EMP
EMP or Electromagnetic pulse,charge can cause all system to shutdown like a shockwave instead than over 50% nuclear radiotion form.
There are many type of EMP but the most famous EMP charge is EMP blast and EMP shockwave.
For this two EMP's,they are the most dreadful and enough to shut a city down and cause over thousands of megawatt of electricity current.
Example:
1.For EMP shockwave:
Detail:
1.Charge over defence:80,000 to 100,000 watts(Whz) per minutes charge
2.Overload charge:Massive damage over one city and cause nuclear radiation
2.For EMP blast:
Detail:
1.Will cause blast like massive mines or EMP blast charge defence will charge 30% nuclear atoms.Can cause one place radiated and exposed to sun power.
2.Sun power radiation can cause 70% of heat and 30% of shutting down all one city about 700 per square meter.
LASER
Laser defence charge beam or atom heat can be expose about 3000 degree celcius and maximum can be heated to a beam of light.
Inside a laser had billions millions of atom that causes high radiation burning sight.It can cause high effect on human neither dows solid armor.
Laser has a compabillity to become a weapon in the future.
Like a laser gun,it can be charge and no need waste of time to refuel your bullet.
2.Laser also can be use for many things and weapons like in Star Wars movie,the Light Saber.
Info: 1.Laser can be extreme powerful that can burn even organic tissue cells and effects on radiation overheat if on too long.
2.Laser can be reach up to 10,000 celcius and enough to slice a building in one chop.
PLASMA
Plasma or a ray(hi-heated atomic radiation) can be a deadly weapon.It contains a small doze of nuclear reaction and it almost like a particle beam to blow a charge.It has 60% of magnectic fields and 20% of electric charge plus 20% of nuclear conductor that enough to kill three person with one shot.
Detail:
1.Highly contains atomic fusion cause heat or overheat that enough to melt or burn one aluminium down.
Example of density:
Heat: Reach up tp 100,000 celcius
Radiation:Melting substance to liquid.
Neither that,plasma can be use in daily life for everyone and can be generate to electric and waste-usable substance.
Example can use about 70% power for three machines instead using turbine.
Another 30% can be use for recycle things like plastic and burnable usage.
For it,this three weapon can cause very harmful and even nuclear radiation can destroy one whole city almost 1000 square per feet or miles.
As usual,weapon in the next future generation will be very harmful neither it can cost life in Earth.
Benny Liew......(15)
Nation wide has selected that world domination can cause unfolded area and may cause losing human population too.
Nuclear populated to thousand or billion of atomic substance or reaction to mutation or toxic.
Example:
About EMP charge power,Laser power and Plasma power
EMP
EMP or Electromagnetic pulse,charge can cause all system to shutdown like a shockwave instead than over 50% nuclear radiotion form.
There are many type of EMP but the most famous EMP charge is EMP blast and EMP shockwave.
For this two EMP's,they are the most dreadful and enough to shut a city down and cause over thousands of megawatt of electricity current.
Example:
1.For EMP shockwave:
Detail:
1.Charge over defence:80,000 to 100,000 watts(Whz) per minutes charge
2.Overload charge:Massive damage over one city and cause nuclear radiation
2.For EMP blast:
Detail:
1.Will cause blast like massive mines or EMP blast charge defence will charge 30% nuclear atoms.Can cause one place radiated and exposed to sun power.
2.Sun power radiation can cause 70% of heat and 30% of shutting down all one city about 700 per square meter.
LASER
Laser defence charge beam or atom heat can be expose about 3000 degree celcius and maximum can be heated to a beam of light.
Inside a laser had billions millions of atom that causes high radiation burning sight.It can cause high effect on human neither dows solid armor.
Laser has a compabillity to become a weapon in the future.
Like a laser gun,it can be charge and no need waste of time to refuel your bullet.
2.Laser also can be use for many things and weapons like in Star Wars movie,the Light Saber.
Info: 1.Laser can be extreme powerful that can burn even organic tissue cells and effects on radiation overheat if on too long.
2.Laser can be reach up to 10,000 celcius and enough to slice a building in one chop.
PLASMA
Plasma or a ray(hi-heated atomic radiation) can be a deadly weapon.It contains a small doze of nuclear reaction and it almost like a particle beam to blow a charge.It has 60% of magnectic fields and 20% of electric charge plus 20% of nuclear conductor that enough to kill three person with one shot.
Detail:
1.Highly contains atomic fusion cause heat or overheat that enough to melt or burn one aluminium down.
Example of density:
Heat: Reach up tp 100,000 celcius
Radiation:Melting substance to liquid.
Neither that,plasma can be use in daily life for everyone and can be generate to electric and waste-usable substance.
Example can use about 70% power for three machines instead using turbine.
Another 30% can be use for recycle things like plastic and burnable usage.
For it,this three weapon can cause very harmful and even nuclear radiation can destroy one whole city almost 1000 square per feet or miles.
As usual,weapon in the next future generation will be very harmful neither it can cost life in Earth.
Benny Liew......(15)
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